can i take that rude anon’s ask as an excuse to ask about ken’s memories again?? specifically, did you ever get jealous of anyone else’s digimon partner (or even a wild digimon hell) and want them for yourself?

I don’t know whether you’re familiar with my canon (Digimon 02) at all, or not. All I have to say is… hooboy. In the beginning, jealousy was a huge motivating factor for me.

When I first entered the digital world I was around 12 years old, and I was a very bitter, competitive kid. My digimon partner, Wormmon, was small, weak, shy, and quiet. I felt like I got cheated, like he was a handicap. I thought that the digital world was just a game, and I figured I got the worst starter in the game.

And that was where it all started. Not only did I decide that I was going to take over the whole digital world. But I was also going to create the perfect digimon to be my partner. I was going to hack the game to make the most ridiculously OP mewtwo level Frankenstein’s monster of a digimon that I could come up with.

I spent ages on it. I looked at the stats for every digimon I could find, looking at strengths, weaknesses. Minmaxing the hell out of it. I wanted to use parts from only the strongest digimon, to create something that was *worthy* of me. Looking back, that thing was such an ugly mess, but I took pride in it, at the time. I was like a kid with his first Sonic OC. It was a hilarious mismatched, gary-stu mess, but I thought it was the best thing ever. I called it Chimeramon.

And of course the whole time, I was ignoring my real partner. I ignored his advice, and his affection, and I ignored his strength, because I thought he was weak, and useless. Of all the shitty things I did, I think that’s the one that I regret the most. Hurting the creature who was always there for me, and only cared for me and wanted to help.

So yeah… I was jealous of other people’s digimon. All of them. :/